You’ve made the decision to start dating Asian women. Perhaps due to the fact that you haven’t had success finding love close to you. Or maybe you discovered that culture in Asia makes it so that they believe that the women there have what you want in a relationship.
So you go to an online dating site to meet Asian women.
Imagine that you find someone who fits all your preferences: beautiful, smart, and serious about a long-term relationship. You connect on a deep level and you are convinced you just have to fly out and meet her. All is well until you run into a small problem.
And that problem is meeting her family.
Family is important in all cultures across all continents. But in many Asian countries, it’s not just important. In the west, people cut off toxic family members all the time. In Asia, people grin and bear it. That’s not to say that all Asian families are toxic, but family is so important that people will prioritize it over their own well-being.
A lot of women in Asia will also prioritize their families over their own relationships, including romantic ones. The two of you could be a perfect match and she’d still end it if her parents say so, even if it means breaking her own heart.
What does this mean for you? It means that if her family doesn’t like you, then the relationship is over. She could be head over heels in love with you and she’d still end things because her family has misgivings about you.
Love conquers all—that’s what you’re used to. But in Asia, filial piety trumps romantic love every single day of the week and twice on Sundays.
So how do you stop yourself from making a bad impression on her family and from giving them any excuse to shut your relationship down?
But, how is it that you’re supposed to make a good first impression?
Before you even start applying the first page of the dating playbook, make sure your Asian-style manners are up to date. Here are some basics:
The first thing that you need to know when you meet an Asian family is to take off your shoes. More often than not, there’ll be a rack by the door for people to put their shoes. You’re probably used to just walking into your house after being outside. But Asian families generally don’t want you to track dirt into the house.
Basically, they want to keep their homes free of any outside germs and they don’t want you sneaking them in via the bottom of your shoes.
There’s also the token that you need to bring. You can’t just show up empty-handed. You don’t need to come laden with gifts like you’re Santa Claus, but you do need to have a token gift for them. Maybe a bottle of liquor or some candy. Maybe even a fruit basket. The gift itself isn’t important. The sentiment behind it is.
Another thing you need to keep in mind when meeting an Asian family is to know your place. There is a pecking order and you’re at the bottom. Sure, they’ll treat you well as a guest, but you’re not supposed to act as if her parents are your equal.
You may be used to getting friendly with a partner’s parents, but you shouldn’t get overly familiar with them. Treat them with filial piety, even if you’re closer in age to them than you are to their daughter.
Speaking of their daughter, they’ll also keep an incredibly close eye on how you treat her. In Asia, casually dating someone isn’t as common as it is in the West. Sure, things are changing in some countries, but most parents are still going to want their daughters to not date around and get married as soon as possible.
They’ll also want to make sure that the man their daughter dates and eventually marries is going to be good to her. Part of the reason why a family would want to get their daughter married off so quickly is so that they’ll have the assurance that she’ll be taken care of.
So make sure that you treat her well. And make sure that you make it clear to them that you’re not looking for something casual, that you want something real, and that you’re in it for the long haul. If you can show them that you’re serious about marrying and taking care of her, then you’ve basically got their approval in the bag.
But her parents aren’t the only ones you’ll have to win over. In a lot of Asian cultures, the parents themselves still practice filial piety.
So it’s not just her parents you’ve got to look out for. You’re also going to have to look out for her grandparents on top of everything. Winning them over makes it easier to win her parents over.
On that note, people in Asia tend to take the advice of their family to heart. So it’s not just parents and grandparents. You’ll have to convince aunts, uncles, cousins, and maybe even family friends who are close enough that they’re family in all but blood. Extended families are the biggest pitfall of Asian dating.
Finally, there’s how serious you are about starting your own family. In a lot of Asian cultures, a lot of women are encouraged to be mothers as well as wives. This means that they’ll want to have kids as soon as possible.
Families also encourage this type of behavior. So if you want to remain child-free, or if you already have kids and don’t want more, then that’s not going to win you a lot of brownie points with her or with her family.
But, if you do want to have kids with her, then that’s going to go over really well with her family. Just be aware that a lot of them may butt in and be more than a little involved in the baby’s life.
There are a lot of guys who want to date Asian women. But Asian women don’t just appear out of thin air. They’re raised by families – families that you’ll have to win over if you want to win her over as well.
Remember, winning over the family is half the battle. Meeting and dating an Asian woman? We can help you with that. All you need to do is register on our site for free and you can immediately connect with beautiful Asian women.
