As most of our elders would say, “Finish college first, then boys will come lining up for you.”
The golden question is: Is it a universal experience?
According to the 2023 statistics from Smarter Degree, 24 years old is the average age in the US when people obtain their college degrees. Scientifically, that’s one full year before a person has a fully developed pre-frontal cortex — the part of the brain responsible for reasoning, planning, judgment, impulse control, and… ta-da! Emotions!
This means once you grow further into adulthood, your brain becomes more rational. However, in the case of love, logic is often thrown out the window. As neuroscience puts it — love can be illogical.
No! At least, not exactly. As Ed Sheeran sang in Thinking Out Loud, “People fall in love in mysterious ways.” Love doesn’t have a time frame or a due date, and definitely, no jail time solely because you aren’t swept off your feet. Your desire for balance, love, and purpose is normal.
Look both on the inside and outside. Physical attractiveness is hitting two birds with one stone — a grabber for your potential love interest and a self-confidence boost. Hitting your fitness goal, treating yourself with skincare or annual facials, or being productive with your passions may be costly, but its wonders to your mental health will surely make you a charmer as stated in a study by McCroskey and McCain.
You may want to sit and write down your short-term goals. Stay present, be mindful of your capabilities, honor your pace, and surround yourself with great friends. These could ease down your narrowness in targeting a specific age in finding love as you focus on socializing, relieving stress, and feeling a sense of belonging even without the romantic aspect yet.
In having the courage to explore uncertainties, you get to unlock self-discovery beyond what you deem common. You get to create a life full of richness and resilience and instill these in others. Why not start a new hobby? Start up a business? Write a book? Save to travel overseas? Do volunteer work? Explore online dating?
People don’t fully remember if you have the best outfits or the latest iPhone model. Appreciation deepens when you know your character. With that, who you truly are overshadows your appearance. As stated by LH Recovery, don’t be afraid to be assertive and show up as you are.
Going into your mid-twenties might have certain advantages such as kickstarting your maturity. Whether you have a fully developed pre-frontal cortex or not, you are just as worthy of love and affection. Embrace your side of weirdness, give yourself grace in growth, and don’t waste the lessons in between.
So, does love come only after a fully developed pre-frontal cortex? We don’t think so.
Love exists because you are living right now in the first place anyway.
